Is Your Marriage Still A Priority?

Every year, as the midway point approaches, I can’t help but think about the goals that I had set earlier in the year. Evaluating if I’m taking the proper steps to achieving those goals. Identify areas that need some fine tuning and adjustments. Outside of my professional goals that I set annually. There is one area that I always want to ensure that receives the attention that it deserves. That area is my marriage. 

Abby and I have been together for a total of eleven years, married for four. We have two kids and another one the way. I love her more than I could articulate and the family that we are raising. She means so much to me! My actions are bent towards ensuring our marriage is as strong and healthy as possible. We both have chosen to commit to our marriage. We willing put in the necessary amount of work that a marriage needs. We do our best to be on the same page, but like any marriage, there’re times we get off track. Arguments, improper boundaries, and parenting differences happen.

Small issues, if left unchecked, could lead to big marital issues. If these affairs are not dealt with, love and respect could begin to erode within the relationship. Fifty percent of marriages end in divorce. Fifty percent…! Don’t let that be yours. Choose to commit, put the work in that is necessary, and don’t give up. There are times when an unbiased third party is needed to re-center a marriage. There is often a negative stigma about marriage counseling, and there shouldn’t be. It could save your marriage, alleviate tensions, and/or even rekindle a dwindling or nonexistent flame. For some, it’s a big step to even go see a marriage counselor. Maybe it’s due to pride. Maybe it’s stressful having to admit the relationship has issues and isn’t perfect. Or, the uncomfortable feeling of having to open up, talk, and be vulnerable with a third party. Whatever the reason may be, please allow counseling to be an option. I’m not going to lie; it can be awkward. The advice can be hard to swallow, but sometimes it’s a necessity. Especially when it could save your marriage. That unbiased third party could provide great insight into areas that need attention. Don’t let things go without the attention they deserve! If needed, let marriage counseling be an option for you. 

For awhile now, I’ve wanted to share about the concept of marriage counseling and how important it is to have a healthy marriage. Marriage in general affects every area of our lives. Hence, having a healthy marriage is vital. In the time we have been married and even before, Abby and I have always had people that wanted to pour into our relationship. People who would lend an ear, give their advice, and be there for us. If your relationship is going well, be ready and willing to pour into another couple that needs guidance.

I should post a disclaimer that our marriage has been wonderful! However, we both are aware that there is always an area we could learn to do better in. I’d say almost annually we talk to a marriage counselor. If it’s not a formal meeting, it’s a phone call. Choose to be influenced by couples or counselors that recognize the importance of having Jesus Christ at the center of a relationship. It is through their words or watching their modeled behaviors that you will be given the best direction.

We have done other things in addition to meeting with a counselor, like marriage retreats, seminars, books, and courses as well.

A few of our recommendations:

• 5 Love Languages
• 31 Prayers for my Husband
• 31 Prayers for my Wife
• Boundaries
• Love & Respect
• Marriage After God book
• Marriage After God podcast
• Focus on Marriage podcast

Abby wrote a blog post on the topic of marriage here. I recommend you check it out! Let one of your goals be a stronger and healthier marriage! Choose to make your marriage a priority.