What’s a blog without a birth story?!

A lot of people have reached out to hear my birthing stories, especially with the latest arrival of my son. In a small town like mine, I quickly became famous (among my awesome medical team at St.Mary’s) for silent labors. I don’t know why this blessing fell upon me. It’s actually something I continue to think about over and over again. Why did God allow this for me? I know what you’re thinking: “Don’t question it!” However, when you have witnessed yourself go through not one, but two labor and deliveries and never feel an ounce of pain, you become somewhat baffled.

So This is What Happened…

Okay, here’s the story. With my daughter Mia, I was a week overdue and induced. Leading up to that day, I experienced an extreme, uncomfortable feeling that cannot be explained. During the day, I was fine. I could go about my normal duties and lead a somewhat normal day. At night, however, I would writhe in pain. Being new at this, I called the labor unit several times for consult. A couple of those times they advised me to come in to be monitored. I remember them saying “how far apart are your contractions?” My reply “I have no idea, I just feel a continual tightening in my abdominal region that does not subside with walking, a bath, stretching, position changes, etc.” I remember breaking down in tears to my doctor when he gave me a date to be induced after being a week overdue. At the time, I could not understand why he wouldn’t just give me what I wanted, but looking back, he knew exactly the right timing for everything to go smooth. There’s a whole message right in that last sentence about God’s timing, am I right?!

The Time Had Arrived!

Induction date was here! September 6, 2019. Our doctor recommended we go out to dinner, eat a good meal, and then come to the hospital. We ate a GOOD meal. A sweet couple who knew us well even paid for our meal on their tab. It was already looking like a blessed evening. Maybe this couple thought “look at them sitting there smiling, they have no clue what’s up ahead soon!” I laugh all over again just thinking about it.

We got to the hospital about 40 minutes shy of 7:00 PM. Being newbies, we took the time very literal. We thought “we were not told to go in any sooner, so we will just sit here and wait.”

But not us, not a Stanavich! We don’t sit around and WAIT. My husband’s idea: walk the entire hospital parking lot until 7! Here I was, uncomfortable, overstuffed, and extremely warm from the day’s forecast, but we walked!

7 PM came. We entered the hospital. The staff laughed when I said in a hopeful voice “I’m here for my induction!” As they began monitoring my vitals, they asked if I was experiencing any anxiety. Our reply, why do you ask? Well, apparently my heart rate was through the roof. Brett piped up “well we did just walk a lot of inclines in the parking lot for 45 minutes”. Baffled, the staff laughed and then told me to find a method to relax and bring my heart rate down.

I brought out candy crush. We still laugh to this day. Candy crush is my go to game for relaxing and passing time. There were actually moments I would be bothered by staff entering to do vitals because I was so caught up in my current game. Ridiculous, but very true.

As the time passed, I began actively dilating. My candy crush game was strong, Brett worked out in the corner of the room, requested coffee on the hour, and was enjoying his stay at hotel St. Mary’s.

“I Can’t Sleep Through This…”

We were about to go to bed for the night. I was 5 cm dilated but no sign of a fast progression. Just as the nurse was about to leave the room, I got the extreme feeling of having to push. It came out of no where. I had dilated from 5 cm to 10 cm in just minutes. As Brett was getting out of the shower, he watched as they transformed the room for our baby’s big arrival. I remember the nurse saying to him, “get ready, she’s going to have this baby!”

We were in the fifth hour from the time I was induced. I remember bracing myself for the pain to come, knowing that it’s impossible to not feel pain when a seven pound baby is coming out of a very narrow passage.

The doctor arrived. It’s go time!
Three big pushes, and Mia Grace had arrived.

I never felt a thing. An all natural birth with no pain. I couldn’t believe it. It didn’t feel real looking at the sweet baby that just came from inside of me, on the outside. Was she really mine?! I birthed her?! Brett and I were in shock. I think he was relieved, too, that he got off with a very easy support role. Nevertheless, it was like witnessing a miracle before our eyes. We had our beautiful, healthy baby girl. We had her with no complications and no pain, naturally.

Sixteen Short Months Later…

My handsome son, Christopher Thomas.
Easiest pregnancy. I was sure to pay for it in labor. I was convinced.

I was induced once again for my son. Four days overdue, and I was simply ready only because it was more exhausting to chase a toddler around at home all day. The hospital felt like a resort the second time around. Oh how I missed my baby at home, but to have people waiting on you for a change, I couldn’t help but soak it all in.

They chose to start with the simplest way to induce me overnight. It was unsuccessful. The morning came and I couldn’t wait until they hooked me up to Pitocin. To both of our surprise, the same labor and delivery nurse I had for Mia, was the same nurse I happened to have for Christopher! We were so excited to be reunited again. Yes, it’s a small hospital, but this nurse happened to be per diem. She had to pick up one shift every three months I believe to stay active…and it happened to be the same day I came in to be induced. Amazing! You can guess by now how the next labor went. Candy crush was downloaded, I got super in to it, and Brett read a book and continued to work virtually from his laptop. It was again five hours from the time I was induced and a few pushes later to bring Christopher into this world. My nurse and I concluded that whenever I got a contraction, I would just get the sensation to urinate. So that’s all I can tell you. I wish I had a more scientific answer for you, but even my doctors could not explain to me why some women labor silently. It’s a mystery, and I experienced it twice!

I’ll Wrap It Up.

Sometimes it’s hard being a mom of now two babies and, yet, not be able to relate to the most common thing that unites all mothers. Hear me out before you write me off. I listen to birthing stories often and am in just awe of how strong, resilient, and powerful birthing a baby is, no matter what method is used! It’s an amazing yet traumatic process, and I can’t speak much on it. For those who don’t know me, I don’t tell my story often, well because I fear judgement. It’s hard to sound humble when you say you don’t know what it’s like to have pain in labor or delivery.

I have to remind myself that I birthed babies too, and I can tell my story too.

Family Matters.

For me, family is at the center of this blog. Family is my whole world. I know I was created with the the purpose of being a mom. I look forward to sharing many more stories on my journey in postpartum life and motherhood in general. It’s important that we get back to normalizing a reverence for motherhood, normalizing dropping everything for your family, normalizing that being a stay at home mom is a job and then some. It’s time to break the social norms that culture tries to pressure us moms into conforming to. The greatest impact we will ever have in this life is in our home. I don’t say that lightly. It is a huge responsibility. As a mom, you were hand picked for your children to be the guiding light to their path. As moms, we are given such a short window to do our work. With God’s hand on it, we can rest in knowing that we are exactly where we are meant to be.

Link to my favorite newborn essential items can be found here.