My Journey Through Painless Labor and Delivery

If you know me either personally or through this median, you have gathered by now that I have had a history of quick, painless labors. It is a unique experience to say the least, one that I too tell others that I am in disbelief over. This is a lengthy blog, but how can one sum it all up in a few short paragraphs? I hope you are intrigued and find some enjoyment out of my personal experience with painless labors.

Third times a charm

We recently welcomed our third baby into the world, a little boy. I shared how miraculously and quickly my daughter came in one of my first blogs, My Birth Story. While all birth stories are memorable, hers will always replay so vividly in my mind. She was the first to usher in this phenomenon of painless labors.

Anyways, my third labor and delivery. It was yet again a quick labor, a medically induced labor. Leading up to the big day, I experienced a lot of discomfort. I have this odd theory that my body wants to go in to labor, but can never fully commit to full on, patterned contractions alone. I have joked with my OB several times saying “…I need the drugs, the pitocin is the only thing that compliments my body.” This time around was no different. I would have very uncomfortable nights and then seemingly normal, if not exceptionally good days. You become convinced at the end that this baby will never come; someone is just too cozy in the womb to make big moves. 

Labor and Delivery 

I was induced a little over forty weeks. I was walking around 2 cm dilated and 80% effaced for two weeks. From the time they induced me, to giving birth was a little over four hours. My OB approached me and asked if I wanted an epidural. I confidently said no, but could not help but have that question roll around in my mind for the time to follow, wondering if I would have regretted the boldness I had in saying no. They broke my water as soon as I had two rounds of antibiotics in my system for GBS. That will always be my favorite part. I’m not sure what it feels like to spontaneously happen, but when your water breaks, it provides instant pressure relief and is satisfying to watch that pregnant belly slowly shrink as fluids are shed. It’s interesting how the more labors you go through, the more in tune you are to your body. I knew that once they broke my water, it was game time, we would soon be meeting our baby. (Side note: we never find out the gender. So the anticipation builds even more knowing soon you’ll finally be surprised with a boy or girl! It truly is the best surprise.) I have to thank my incredible husband, he made seemingly endless trips to the bathroom with me, IV pole in hand. When I experience a contraction, the only sensation I have is to urinate. So you can imagine what it feels like to get up from the therapy ball every 2-5 minutes, after your water has been broken as well. It’s messy, and I look forward to a nice shower after the process is over. 

The time in between was spent finishing a book and bouncing on a therapy ball while watching hilarious TikTok videos. Laughter truly is the best medicine. The more I can joke around, the better I feel. Between my husband’s witty comments, staff interactions, and my own thoughts, I go into a different mode. The focus is not on the labor, it’s on the anticipation of the labor being over. Even without the pain, it would be so easy for me to become consumed with the process, that it could actually hurt. The monitors and constant monitoring of vitals, the IV, the contractions’ timing and intensity are all things I leave in the hands of the staff. I let them worry about it, and let my inexperienced self relax as much as possible. 

Despite not having pain, I know when I am in transition. I describe it as feeling like “you have to have a bowel movement but it’s 20 more minutes to a rest stop.” You get it? It’s that “woah” discomfort that tells you these contractions are now evicting this baby. I told my husband to get my nurse, it was time. The staff rushed in, I was a little over 9 cm dilated, another few seconds for my OB to gown up, and he told me I can start to push. Within a minute, maybe two, we met our baby boy! I don’t experience pain with pushing. I’ve never felt the “ring of fire”, it’s truly unexplainable. When I held my third baby, I said to myself “oh my gosh another painless labor and delivery.” Im still in disbelief over it. 

My Theory 

Chasing after two toddlers, you have no choice but to stay active. You have no choice but to pick your big babies up, reach and bend in awkward positions to rescue a toy, or a wild boy from surfaces and places he does not belong. I was forced to keep going even on the days I had no desire too. My point in mentioning this is, no matter what the situation looks like, I think part of my ease with labors is forcing yourself mentally to get into a tougher mindset. My doctor will always say to me: “Abby I think you experience pain, you just enter a zone and have the mental ability to block it out-your pain threshold is very high.”

Half the battle stems from the mind. I’m not by any means for all of this new age “manifesting” what you want, but I do hold my faith in a God who knows intimately what I need, what I can tolerate, and gives us the desires of our heart when we align our lives with His plan. Am I being rewarded by God in this area? By no means. But I am blessed, and that cannot be denied. My response to people has been this theme of “undeserved grace from God”. I certainly don’t deserve this unique experience, but I’ll happily accept it! 

Healthy Mind, Healthy Body

Back to the mind…half of the battle starts with our mental perspective. I recall going into my first experience. Both my mom and mother in law coached me ahead of time by saying “take it one contraction at a time” and “push the pain away”. They both inspired me to have natural births. There is no trophy to be earned, but I wanted the most natural experience I could possibly have in a hospital for both myself and our babies. I remember giving myself pep talks leading up to my first experience. 

“Abby, take this one contraction at a time.” “This will be over as quickly as it started.” “Millions of women do this, and keep having babies, you can do it too.” “Better out than in!” “Work hard, the reward is so sweet!” 

When people discuss my labors with me, I always tell them to trust that your body was created for this purpose. It knows exactly what to do and when to do it. Mothers are the strongest people I am privileged to know and be. Who else can birth a baby or go through the most complicated form of surgery and then be expected to return to home or work and pick up where they left off? Mothers are incredible, and I truly believe God chose women because of our strength, perseverance, and ability to nurture all at the same time. Expect for labor to be tough, but at the same time expect that there is an end to it, and the reward is the best!

Fear is crippling. You cannot go into one of the most physically traumatizing events already loosing. You need to have faith in yourself, your spouse as your biggest supporter, and your God that you will make it to the other side of this. 

Own the experience. It’s your body, your baby, and your story. I truly believe that your actions determine how things unfold. Leading up to labor, I don’t slow down. I keep moving, keep accomplishing little projects or goals I have, and put as much effort as I can into keeping life around the home normal. Pushing yourself to live despite being uncomfortable strengthens you both mentally and physically. 

Though I would love for a baby to come early, I never focus on preterm induction methods. Apart from staying physically active, I do my best to make it to 40 weeks (my babies help that process, being that they were all over due). Focusing on the wrong things will leave you feeling anxious and defeated. The best solution is to live in the moment and take it day by day. Don’t stop living while you wait for your baby’s arrival; consider the time you have left as more of an opportunity to prep, spend time with your spouse/kids, and rest before more is demanded of you.

Staying active and healthy is critical to a good labor and delivery (disclaimer: I didn’t say painless haha). I definitely noticed I had my best pregnancy and labor thus far because I physically got in great shape before I got pregnant, I was able to stay active and workout my whole pregnancy, and this resulted in minimal weight gain  and an overall feeling of happiness knowing I gave myself and my baby the best opportunity for a health pregnancy. 

Lastly, get excited about labor. I have always tried to be as optimistic as possible. Treat yourself to fresh pajamas for the hospital, pack some makeup to put on for when you’re in recovery, purchase some new postpartum clothing to motivate you and make you feel good when coming home. It’s true when they say “look good, feel good”. So much time, energy, and money goes into the baby, but don’t neglect to take care of yourself too. 

Let’s Connect and Wrap this Up

Initially when writing about this, I honestly struggled. Writing and erasing were on repeat. More than just a story, I try and use these blogs as a way to reach the hearts of our readers. When thinking about how this ties into a Maverick way of living, a lifestyle, I couldn’t connect it. However, when I sat in the stillness and thought about my husband, his constant support, and my three children, I couldn’t help but say “this is the life!”. How blessed am I to be given the ability to have children. As mothers, take time today to appreciate your spouse and children. Dedicate time while you are going about the responsibilities of your day to pray for them, to reminisce on special moments. For those who long to have babies, the Bible says “the barren womb is never satisfied”…so I want to acknowledge that. For grieving mothers who have lost a child, and for those who are struggling to become pregnant, I pray for you. God is our comforter and He is always enough, He is always with us. Choose today to trust that God created you, He knows your every need and desire, and He has a perfect plan for you. Whether it’s making a family or going through labor, know that you are one strong woman.